Blog 9

Set up a social networking dating site that uses the principles of imago relationship therapy.

When I began reading the Imago relationship therapy article I found it to have specific timing in my life because I had just taken a girl home to meet my family and one day her and I spent the day with my mom. They caught each other giving me crap for the same things and often sharing the same opinion of the things I do. So much so to the point where my mom felt as long as she could catch up with her and she said I was doing alright my mom would believe it. After reading this article I began to think about why I’m attracted to this girl and I came to the conclusion that she has strength in places I don’t. It’s awesome to spend time with someone who you admire simply for being different than you.

This is the kind of relationship that we’re all after. The one where your partner “completes” you and gives you that nurturing you’ve become accustomed to from birth. If I were to design a dating website based around this idea I would first start with a battery of questions that start from the beginning of your life. Asking about your parents, their relationship with each other and their relationship with you. Find out how they were involved in your life and what aspects they found to be most important to be involved in. I would then take it a step further and find out what annoyed you about your parents, like if they are constantly asking questions that annoyed you or if they weren’t involved enough. This would determine who the minimizers and maximizers are in order to match the minimizers and maximizers as the article stated. This is important to find out about how your ideal partner will help you in the healing process which is a lot of what a relationship is.

The next part of the profiling process would ask more general personal questions but with a weight on how you see yourself and what your strengths and weaknesses are. This is important for a relationship because you value your partner for their strengths and what they bring to the relationship. After compiling all this information the website would match people based on how their parents raised them and their strengths to make “one whole person”. Michael Borash makes the point that “were born whole individuals but through relationships with our caretakers needs are created which we then look to partners to fill”. (Borash 2012).

Zielinski, Joseph J. (1999). Discovering Imago Relationship Therapy. Journal of Psychotherapy, 36, 91-101.

Borash, M. (2012, November 11). Imago relationship therapy. Retrieved from http://www.mayakollman.com/about_imago.html

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